I spent my whole life
Running from monsters,
Because I was scared of fights.
As a kid,
I naively let myself believe
In the possibility of a life without them
“Everyone has monsters,” they’d say
(Not me)
My life without monsters,
Surrounded by people I loved
I was so lucky.
Until I saw it.
The monster in my kitchen,
Only an infant yet hideous
I screamed and ran.
(That was close)
My life without monsters,
Surrounded by people who loved me,
They couldn’t know.
The next one was in my closet.
A child, rotten,
Slightly hurt, asleep,
I quietly shut the door and ran.
(Never opening that again)
My life without monsters,
Surrounded by people I cared for,
Who would worry.
As I got older,
The jump scares grew,
Under my bed,
An adolescent, twisted,
Sobbing, Ashamed.
(Run)
On the ceiling,
In my classroom,
In the mirror,
Each one older than before.
(Just keep running)
My life without monsters,
Surrounded by people I had helped,
Fight bigger monsters.
There were monsters everywhere,
My head, my heart, my family,
I couldn’t tell them apart anymore,
Still scared to face them, I ran.
(And they chased)
My life without monsters,
Surrounded by people who worried,
But never figured out what I ran from.
I ran and ran and ran,
And when I looked around,
In the middle of darkness,
I found myself alone.
(Maybe I was the monster)
My life without love,
Surrounded by monsters who grew,
Because I was scared of fights.